Thursday, October 13, 2011

Oh ok....

Well--it's been almost 19 months since my last post. Did you miss me? Nah--I know.
Since my last post, a number of things have happened in my life, and I've allowed them to derail my artistic efforts. That's right--I've ALLOWED myself to be distracted and divert my attention away from making art--indeed--even sewing or quilting anything! I haven't been in my studio, save for making a few pairs of earrings or to iron table linens, for months!!
A few things have been significant: The birth of my first grandchild, Lukas Brian! The death of my father, Benedikts (here they are together last year.) My mother-in-law, Juta also died earlier this year. The growth of our business (good news!) The deterioration of the condition of my back, despite an attempt at physical therapy this summer.
All these events and conditions have served to frustrate and distract.
The family issues have come to close, with the resolution of estates and probates, so I can put that behind me. Our computer business is humming along nicely with the addition of new employees and some new management software, so all is well there. My back...well it's still a pain in the arse, but with more PT and some weight loss, I can live with it.
I also kind of dropped out of the Milwaukee Art Quilter's Group. I love the concept of all these great fiber artists getting together to do group challenges and show their work--but the deadlines for the challenges and show were killing me. And this is driving me crazy!
On one hand, I like having deadlines--they force me to have a bit of discipline in finishing some art. On the other hand--they've becoming quite stressful for me, so I've just let them go by without making anything!
(I did make a commitment to finish one challenge so that it can be shown with all the others at the Wisconsin Quilt Museum this coming winter--I will definitely finish that!)
Anyway--this goes back YEARS! I have started and not finished probably dozens (DOZENS!) of projects. Is it that I have no discipline? Am I afraid of finishing for some reason? Are the things I make not good enough? Am I just nuts?
I just don't know.
What I do know is that I better do SOMETHING or I really will go nuts. I have a need, as all artists do, to express myself through fabric, painting, something. Many years ago, I read "The Artist's Way" and did alot of the exercises to bring out the artist in me. I don't remember a lot of it, but I do recall that our art ebbs and flows. There are times when you are filling your vessel, and times when you are pouring it out.
I've been filling my vessel for a couple years now, and I am ready to let it flow out. With some self-discipline and some serious studio time, I can make art. I can.
Meanwhile--here are just a couple pics I've taken over the last 18 months to inspire some art in me: